The Beans
The Beans(卞廾ヨ　日ヨ丹几己) are a mostly unknown, yet incredible dangerous and murderous gang of beans, most of which are plushies or squishies. Origins The Beans were originally started by their now leader, named Fava. Fava was born in Hiroshima on August 5th, 1945, a single day before the Hiroshima bombing. At only 18 hours old, Fava escaped Hiroshima as the bomb fell, and he barely escaped. Fava later had a child with Pinto, a bean whos backstory im too lazy to write, who is actually male. Their child was so full of gay, since sticking two penises inside of eachother causes such an extreme outbreak of gay that serious deformations are likely to occur. Instead however, their child took advantage of the buildup of Gay. He multiplied asexually until 384 beans had been born. Later that day, Pinto died from birth complications and the child died of mental retardation. Fava was devastated, and chose 9 beans to become the leaders. They were nicknamed Kidney, Lupin, Black, Pea, Soy, Adzuki, Chickpea, Mung, and Peanut. Fava then set out with his 384 children and started their quest to destroy "Them." Them "Them" is the primary target of The Beans. "Them" is an ambiguous term, and the meaning is only known by Fava, but since everyone else, except Pea, are too dedicated, they don't need to be told. Pea doesn't know who "Them" is, but wants to. The Beans are so focused on killing who they are told to, that they dont ever truly care. Them is thought to be those who are Gay, and those with diseases such as The Kawaii Virus, but The Kawaii Virus is transmitted by The Beans, and since the virus spreads so quickly, its just common sense that those with the virus are more often targeted. It's most likely Them is just whoever Fava wants dead. The Queer Spear The Queer Spear is a weapon used exclusively by The Homo, and it was created by The Beans to help destroy Them. It was of course stolen by The Homo, but not really, because they offered Sacred Hentai in return, and like any normal gang, The Beans accepted. Rejects Since, in every group of beings, there are rejects. So one would only assume The Beans to have rejects too. Most rejects are gay in some way, but some are rejected for absolutely no conceivable reason, other than Fava decided to exile them. Most of the rejects however, are exiled for very good reasons. Such reasons include beans that come in pods. Being so close to other beings is obvious gay, which is inexcusable. Keychains are also exiled, because they can hook onto things, which sounds pretty fucking gay. Another reject is the bean plushies that can 'open up' which supposedly creates a space for storing small items inside of the plushie. However, the majority have these openings on their back side, which is an obvious entrance for the weiner. Category:Stuff That'll Most Likely Kill You Category:Stuff That'll Most Likely Rape You Category:Bad Guys Category:Possible Aliens Category:Minor Characters